The Bad Years
from Kerrigan-Lowdermilk LIVE
from Tales from the Bad Years
At what age do I have to stop smoking?
‘Cause I think there’s a cut off,
When it stops being cool.
And you just have lung cancer.
And I like wife beaters.
And keg stands.
And indie bands.
But I think there’s a cut off.
I hope it isn’t twenty-five.
And I would hope that I’ll stop being poor someday.
‘Cause I really want a flat screen TV.
Like, my friends all have flat screen TVs,
And I want one.
And an iPhone.
And an IRA.
What’s an IRA?
I don’t know.
Everybody’s getting married
And I can’t do it.
My girlfriend wants to.
But I don’t want to.
‘Cause then you have babies.
And you don’t have one.
You have multiple babies.
In succession.
And babies puke.
They puke almost as much
As the drunk girl my roommate brought home last night.
And I won’t clean up puke
So I can’t have babies.
Or drunk girls.
So I’m standing on 10th avenue.
I’m standing on 10th avenue.
My toilet is dirty.
I’m wearing an undershirt.
I’m thinking of this other girl I met.
And I’m smoking a cigarette.
They say these are
The best years of your life.
I don’t know about that.
Second grade was pretty good.
We went to Wildwood.
Middle school was cool,
I kissed girls. They were sober.
I don’t think these are
The best years of your life.
These are…
These are…
(voices: oh. Oh. Oh...)
These are...
These are…
Oh…